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[01 Feb 2010|11:41pm] |
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Break through barriers, until there are none left to stand in your way. :) It works as a creed.
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[27 Jan 2010|10:40pm] |
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Life is a series of transitional moments, and I'm always ready to make the change :)
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[17 Jan 2010|07:01pm] |
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[11 Jan 2010|08:00am] |
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[16 Dec 2009|09:48am] |
WHAT IS THIS I DON'T EVEN
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[30 Nov 2009|07:07pm] |
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Living in the moment worked out well :)
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[12 Apr 2009|11:23am] |
Getting close to 5 years now. Damn near a quarter of my life, from naive l33t k1dd13 to naive romantic to naive emo to slightly less naive...what am I, now? Too little retrospection and you're doomed to unconsciously repeat your mistakes. Too much retrospection, and you're doomed to reliving them.
I don't know why I still post on here. There's a grand total of maybe five people who still read this, all of who I don't see anymore; all of you who are from a practical standpoint mere acquaintance. This site used to be a crossroads of love, hate, and time killed. Old entries bear the textual vestige of what once was, unlocking floodgates of reminiscence and memories faded by what happened after. Let us be perfectly frank - the height of all this was steeped in nascent teenage bullshit.
Time to leave and live in the moment.
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[05 Apr 2009|04:53pm] |
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I want to snowboard for some strange reason O_o
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[22 Mar 2009|10:41pm] |
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Smoking weed makes you a better person. Why doesn't anyone get this?
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[16 Mar 2009|06:34am] |
Looking for a driver to a rave on the 11th. Admission, gas, and (if you play your cards right) oral sex included.
Also, I passed a pre-employment drug test. What. The. Hell.
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[16 Mar 2009|01:52am] |
"Moral philosophy, or the science of human nature, may be treated after two different manners; each of which has its peculiar merit, and may contribute to the entertainment, instruction, and reformation of mankind. The one considers man chiefly as born for action; and as influenced in his measures by taste and sentiment; pursuing one object, and avoiding another, according to the value which these objects seem to possess, and according to the light in which they present themselves. As virtue, of all objects, is allowed to be the most valuable, this species of philosophers paint her in the most amiable colours; borrowing all helps from poetry and eloquence, and treating their subject in an easy and obvious manner, and such as is best fitted to please the imagination, and engage the affections. They select the most striking observations and instances from common life; place opposite characters in a proper contrast; and alluring us into the paths of virtue by the views of glory and happiness, direct our steps in these paths by the soundest precepts and most illustrious examples. They make us feel the difference between vice and virtue; they excite and regulate our sentiments; and so they can but bend our hearts to the love of probity and true honour, they think, that they have fully attained the end of all their labours.
The other species of philosophers considers man in the light of a reasonable rather than an active being, and endeavours to form his understanding more than cultivate his manners. They regard human nature as a subject of speculation; and with a narrow scrutiny examine it, in order to find those principles, which regulate our understanding, excite our sentiments, and make us approve or blame any particular object, action, or behaviour. They think it a reproach to all literature, that philosophy should not yet have fixed, beyond controversy, the foundation of morals, reasoning, and criticism; and should for ever talk of truth and falsehood, vice and virtue, beauty and deformity, without being able to determine the source of these distinctions. While they attempt this arduous task, they are deterred by no difficulties; but proceeding from particular instances to general principles, they still push on their enquiries to principles more general, and rest not satisfied till they arrive at those original principles, by which, in every science, all human curiosity must be bounded. Though their speculations seem abstract, and even unintelligible to common readers, they aim at the approbation of the learned and the wise; and think themselves sufficiently compensated for the labour of their whole lives, if they can discover some hidden truths, which may contribute to the instruction of posterity."
-Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding
Is that not delicious?
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[28 Feb 2009|02:37am] |
looking over my shoulder
to still still images, still fantasies
'cos my path moves too fast, too fast
i can't keep the track
by the time i reach a dream it's gone
lost to impersonal winds that say
"too bad, too bad"
so i look back for certainty
to a misty dream i never took
just wanted something to hold onto
something to ground me from the gale
a little reminder of where i had tread
so i can look forward and face the change
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[23 Feb 2009|04:27pm] |
Dear LJ:
I got e-gonorrhea. You should all get yourselves checked out.
Love,
Me
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[06 Feb 2009|12:51am] |
Written in part because of what Cor wrote, and partly due to a decent amount of conversations I've had recently.
The transition to my current mindset about the World seems to me to have the same sort of feeling people get when they say they've been enlightened or awoken, that what's been in front of you for all your life appears as though you're seeing it for the first time. I think people tend to become accustomed to ideas and things such that when their lose their novelty, they lose their meaning. I used to think that Everything was a random assortment of material and consciousness with no inherent meaning and in a way I still do. Those beliefs are still held, but with a direction that entirely changed their connotation.
There is no God. Actually, there may be, but to believe in him is logically absurd. His role in theology is twofold : to instill a sense of order in the universe, and to explain the reason for Being. For both points, though, I think it's just as likely that Being and order exist on their own accord. When looking for a why in this matter, one tends to ask to infinite "Well, who created that?" Yet saying that Being is on its own seems slightly more plausible, if only because it's one creation as opposed to something created (God) creating creation.
I had a realization during a hike in Corriganville that led me to the top of a mountain overlooking the freeway pass, as well as Simi and Chatsworth up onto the horizon. Looking down at the cities and their minute details - the cars, the trees, the roads, the sky - I was overtaken by a sense of just how wonderful and exciting Everything really is. Most people would call this divinity, but I prefer the terms holy and sacred. Take a look at any object around you, and wonder just "why" it is. If you're a smartass (which I like), you'll say that your desk came from Ikea, or from trees or plastic. But past that, there exists a point where you can't really adequately answer. There's a certain mysteriousness and aura to Being, and I've come to admire that as a very beautiful thing. It's from that foundation that I came to believe in pantheism as a sound view from which to realize the world.
If we are to realize that Everything either was, is, or will be, life and existence suddenly take on a very unified feeling. What seemed to me as being completely arbitrary and random was a part of this new Unity. Everything from anger to the wonderful way the air is after a cool rain to something as mundane as taking a piss was my chance to experience an infinitesimal sliver of existence, all the more special because it was mine. Good and evil have ceased to take on their original meanings, now being ways that Being could manifest itself, smaller part of the greater whole all the more divine because it merely was.
And Life's never been the same. I am confident in the knowledge that what I do is both meaningless and meaningful. Everything is special, and every thing has a meaning that only itself can truly describe, like all the colors of the rainbow are so *exquisite* when viewed separately, but no less so when put together to make white.
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[26 Jan 2009|04:40pm] |
I deleted my MySpace and Facebook accounts today. Probably going to do Twitter tonight. It feels extremely liberating, not to be tied down mentally by what essentially amounts down to nothing. As I said, I'll be taking a break from things for a while, so I won't be on AIM or on the Net. If you know my phone number, that's the way to get ahold of me.
See you in two weeks.
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[25 Jan 2009|11:07pm] |
Starting a two week Internet break tomorrow.
Should be fun.
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[22 Jan 2009|09:03pm] |
So. I wrote an entry towards the end of this month details that I had some problems that needed to be changed. It's only been a little over three weeks, but it's been three weeks of weird, eerie living. I've quit smoking aside from at parties, but it's a fair concession. I've smoked weed only once. I skateboard something like every and go for walks every night. It feels extremely different from the lifestyle I'm used to, though neither one is wholly good or bad. Like, I can go out pretty much from waking up to going out and about my day, instead of the hour or so of grogginess. Days seem much more bland and not as colored. Just days. I find myself questioning my notion of Self and the changes one can make while still being considered the same person, or if that's even possible.
It's surreal.
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[19 Jan 2009|07:34am] |
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Recently added to my Quotes of Fame: "Only a very small percentage of children can survive bullet wounds to the head."
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